From Sympathy to Empathy

Approximately 10% of the world's population is living with a disability of one type or other.

Majority of us today, if asked, will not be able to define disability. While defining it, the usage of the words and the language actually reflect our innate emotions and perceptions; how we actually feel about it, how we actually see it.

Some words by their very nature degrade and diminish people with disability. The term "disabled young person" conveys a message that the only thing worth mentioning about a person is his/her disability. In this case, it is better to say "young person with a disability" as it emphasizes the person first without denying the reality of the disability.

Sometimes, people with disability are compared to "normal people". Do we think of them as abnormal? This only implies that we ignore the fact that everybody has got their own unique identity and abilities. For comparison, you could say person without a disability.

"A disability is any physical, mental or sensory impairment which makes it necessary

 for a person to significantly change the methods they use to perform life activities"

There are three kinds of people based on their view towards the people with disability.

1. The people who simply don't like to be around a person with disability. They don't like to talk to them, sit with them, eat with them or work with them. Do we consider ourselves superior? At that point of time, they need to pause and think about it. Nobody is disabled by choice. Either they got this disability by birth or by some mishap. And, neither of these can be controlled by humans yet! So, people need to think how will they treat their brothers and sisters if tomorrow, God forbid, they meet an accident and are disabled. Will they stop loving them? Say tomorrow, your child is born with a disability. Would you not love him/her?

      These questions should knock at the door of your mind whenever you see a person with disability.

      2. The people who sympathize with the people with a disability. The humanity in them makes them humble towards people with disability. But you know what, these people can actually create a better world by making people with disability feel that they are a significant part of this very world. There are no two separate worlds. When we give sympathy, we do not reach across to understand how they see the things around them. It's like I don't understand your world, but from this side things look pretty bad. So basically, sympathy is about separation. On the other hand, empathy is about connection. So we need to encourage empathy in place of sympathy. People think they can't understand the experience of disability or, at the very least, if they think they can, they believe it is inherently negative. Of course, it isn't, it's just more unique.

      The key to empathy is that everyone experiences emotions – happiness, sadness, frustration, anger, loneliness etc. And disabled people feel that range of emotion too. So, with that in mind, it’s crucial to help everyone connect with the understanding of the range of emotions evoked by the experience of disability, rather than the few that most people associate with it, namely fear and sadness.

      3. The people who actually understand the feelings of the people with a disability. For them, these people are no different, they are rather special and in fact, more capable than them. They treat them as equals, playing their role as a small cog in the huge machinery of life, just like everybody else.

Every one of us can fall in the third category. All we need to do is just think and take the initiative. The feeling of happiness and bliss will be incomparable, deep and touching. 

So, start today and stay happy, stay blessed!